By Alan Sorensen
My brother-in-law Russel my children's uncle and brother of my children's mother moved in about three weeks ago. He's managed to put a few pounds on (both of us) and dirty a lot of dishes.
But he's done some good things, too.
The faucet in my bathroom now runs water, both hot and cold, and the overhead light switch actually turns on the light.
Visitors to our humble abode don't have to guard their shins against the unhinged and swinging door grabber thing. You know, the doohickey that is attached to the door and the door jamb to prevent the door from swinging wildly in the wind. Russ took it off (What wind?).
He's also threatened to clean the toilet (I said that was the maid's job) and take all of my pack-rat garbage from the back room and throw it away. I don't know, you never really know when you might need a console TV set with no insides or a toaster sans heating elements. And let's not forget the portable 1970-model 19-inch TV set with burned out tubes and no screen.
I also have tons of torn curtains, broken curtain rods, broke shower doors, shredded macram ropes and splintered book shelves.
Whoa. I feel a yard sale coming on.
MSU-Northern's Sweetgrass Society kicks off its annual powwow at the university gym with the first grand entry at 7 p.m. today. Gotta go.
A friend suggested a few months ago that since I like Rocky Boy and my Indian friends so much that I should move to the reservation. Fact is I can't. I'm not a tribal member. I'll just have to be content with my visits.
But that has nothing to do with this weekend's powwow at Northern. Sweetgrass Society is a campus organization consisting of Indians from tribes throughout North America and non-Indians, too.
I'll be there tonight, but not with bells on. Instead, I plan on having a pocket full of dollars that I can use to vote for princess candidates in each of the four age groups: Baby, Little Miss, Junior Miss, and Miss Indian. (And, of course, enough left over for food.)
It was suggested that we run some stories about the old neighborhood grocery stores and gas stations. I would like to say that I remember them all so well that I can just sling them right from the top of my head onto the page. We're going to need some help with this one, Tony and everyone.
My quarter idea seemed kind of silly, even to me, until I realized those guys on TV are selling a piece of cardboard for $19.99. A further enticement to buy is their claim that the supply is limited. There are actually two different companies, as far as I can tell, and maybe more, selling these things. One of the pitchmen offers five free quarters in mint condition if you call right away, and the other pitchman (his coins go on the side of the map, not on top of the states) will send you six. All just for $20? Wow!
It was W. Somerset Maugham, I think, who wrote a novel titled "The Moon and Sixpence." It was a classic. It probably would have sold better if it'd been called "The Moon and a Quarter."
How about those Havre High track teams, both boys and girls. Each team knocked off Great Falls High by the identical score 73 to 72 yesterday afternoon at Havre Middle School track. The temperatures were chilly and the wind was biting, but Havre still prevailed against enormous odds (Bison sweats outnumbered Pony sweats about a billion to one).
Notice how the Great Falls paper put the story on page 3. It did soften the insult a little by putting the Rustlers' victory under the Bison's defeat.
Havre's triumph came just a day after the KG boys and Big Sandy girls served up warnings that they will be tough again this year, too.
Back to Russ. Not only is my home tidier and convenient, my days are getting longer. Russ makes it impossible to crash by 7 p.m. There's always something to do (dishes) and something of interest on TV (Man's overtures to Mars, "Who Wants to be a Millionaire," and stock car racing).
We've also been known to play some cribbage and shoot some pool. What next? Women?