Havre Daily News - News you can use

While Occupy North Pole is threatening to disrupt Christmas, the citizens of Toyland are causing their own ruckus rising up against the current ruling faction in Arab Spring fashion.

Traditionally, Toyland was ruled by Contrary Mary (though some historians say royal advisor Mother Goose was the real power behind the throne), but her reign ended in 1959 when the introduction of Barbara Millicent Roberts saw the dawning of the Barbie Doll Dynasty. Yes, The Barbie Doll.

Now Citizens of Toyland are protesting decades of oppression under the freakishly skinny and nonbending doll-queen, while R...